Birthdays

I don't know, I guess even when my meds are working & I'm "happy", birthdays just aren't all they used to be. Even my birthday- 4 months after the anniversary of The Trauma- is a reminder of what happened. This is just the insight of today for me. 

I love my family & friends & co-activists who've wished me well, I love that yesterday Germany won the World Cup, I love that my daughter wants to spend time with me (she's 12, that's rare). I don't have a reason to be unhappy. 

Something is just always "off". Happy 36th to me though. Tonight we celebrate with darts & bier & friends. I will have no complaints. I just wish it was less stressy.