Thursday, July 10, 2014

"Get over it"

3 words that will send me into a blind rage that makes a charging momma grizzly look like a tame kitten. Get over it? Gee why didn't I think of that? You mean all this time, all I needed to do was turn off the crazy like a switch? Well, your Masters in McDonalds must make you qualified to tell me how to run my life. 

Things I need- 
• To know you're not leaving
• Support
• Guidance
• Time

Things I don't need-
• Judgement 
• Suffocating 
• Telling me to take my meds when I'm having an off day
• See the title of the blog

This is my reality. I live in my head. I relive memories as vividly as the day it happened. I try to do normal things but some days, I can not. Some days I need my space. In fact, I'm one who does better on my own, with my mind occupied & less responsibility. This has caused me to be labeled a "bad mom".  If I'm elevated, a nervous wreck, in a constant depressed state, unplugged from their day to day lives but living at home, that makes me a "good" mom? As opposed to living apart some, getting space, being my own person & actively involving myself when I'm mentally able? 

I may do things differently than the "normal" person or the next guy with PTSD, but this is me. 

I promise next time I will get to the letters.... 

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